Tuesday, 23 April 2013

Triolet


ABaAabAB

Day 27

I have hidden from you for years
Knowing you would be too lovely
My fear that it would end in tears
I have hidden from you for years
We could go for a drink Here's Cheers
I drink mojitos and bubbly
I have hidden from you for years
Knowing you would be too lovely

9 comments:

  1. This is tricky form for me but you conjured the feelings of who longs for another but is also crippled by fear ~

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  2. Interesting piece. It draws me in.

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  3. You worked this form to the max. A fascinating message as well.

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  4. we underestimate ourselves so easy...or probably overestimate others...i like the rather offbeat reveal of your fav drink in the middle as it give the feel all the more of desired intimacy

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  5. This piece flows smooth as a sip a bubbly...nicely done!

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  6. I like...emphasis is just right with minimal extra words ;)

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  7. Great use of the form--it mirrors the push and pull of desire and fear. "Knowing you would be too lovely." Very nice!

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  8. nice triolet! and hey-- i know that feeling...

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  9. Beautifully written,. The repeating lines blend and the flow is smooth. The yearning is almost asphyxiating.

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